"Three quarters of our thoughts will remain unsaid"
-Cynthia Atagbuzia
I know what you are thinking. "Did she just frigging quote herself?" Well I did and I hope one day someone else will. loool.
I will be adhering to the K.I.S.S. method of writing today; Keeping It Shortly Simple.
Now imagine that you had to express every single thought in your head.
I left that space for your imagination...
If I did, I would be:
Parentless- I love my mum so much but sometimes when she is being an excellent mum,(translated as old school bad mum in teenage lingo)I have bad thoughts and if I expressed them I would probably have been disowned. Oh so you want to lie that you haven't had such thoughts abi? In Patience Jonathan's voice, Continuuu.
Lifeless - First I will like to give a shout out to God... You see all the thoughts going on in every one's mind, he knows them, keeps tabs on them and schedules them sometimes. This is not even a case of expression because someone other than me knows them... let me just say that if I had a penny for every time I thought of taking my life or wishing death upon myself, I'd be able to afford a dress for the party I am attending tonight. Thank you God for not taking those thoughts seriously.
A Murderer- Lord knows...Lord knows that I have stabbed and bludgeoned humans in my mind. I have lifted containers up and dropped it on their %&$@# heads. Pardon my Lil Wayne. I have injected humans with lethal substances that haven't been chemically invented. You do not even know the half of it.
Moraless- Please pardon my "e no fit dey for dictionary laye laye" word. These are the stumbling blocks of expression. I know the word is immoral but this one explains it how I feel it. Now I am not saying that my morality is on point o... In fact, it is very far but one thing I am very popular for is embracing the "average ribbon". I try... I really do try. Its just that on some days, I just wish that I was packing my bags to Dubai to go and copulate with one Sheik and come back to Nigeria with plenty money and build house and buy car. I need not tell you that these thoughts have remained thoughts because I am still carless and moneyless. Now that is just an idea of some of the "devil planted,watered and pruned" thoughts that happen in this head of mine.
You can add jobless, friendless, familyless etc to the list.I could go on and on but I'll stop here. You totally have a picture of what I am saying. What is the whole point of this? Expression has been the factor used to judge behavior. People can think highly of us from pretentious actions without knowing the vile things going on in our medula. This just goes to prove that to a great extent, human beings can control the expression of their thoughts. the problem and question is; how long?
How long has that serial killer nurtured the thoughts of gruesome murder?
I really think the effort should be in controlling those thoughts. Do not get me wrong. They.Will.Come. But I think reprimanding ourselves help to rewire the mind as to what thoughts are unhealthy and should not be acted upon.
I get through vile thoughts by actually talking out loud and jokingly cautioning myself. I make myself understand that the thought is just a product of a temporary circumstance and is temporary too in itself.
Do not forget that your true personality is who you are when no one is looking. In this case, you are truly the thoughts you nurture and not the staged act your life is currently mirroring because even the bible says that as a man thinketh in his heart, so he is.
Oh snap! I said I would employ the KISS method. ehhnn well, let us just call this one a French kiss *covers face*.
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