Hurt It Out.

"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt."

-The Fault In Our Stars.

The quote above was gotten from one of my favourite movies of all time, "The Fault In Our Stars".

It's okay, you can judge me for being dark and what not. I am not into statistics and all but whenever my mind decides to do an emotional research (completely based on assumptions), it is never wrong. I personally believe that pain is a stronger emotion than happiness. You must think by now that I have something against happiness considering my previous post about it. I honestly do love to be happy. Infact this blog is a means to happiness.

The truth is that, you can defend what you know and in this case, I think pain and I have come a long way.

I'd like to dissociate this post with any religious faith because our faith most of the time, tell us to be careful of what we believe or profess. This is me not accepting pain as my portion. (I reject it in Jesus Name lmao) This is me writing on an experience.

By now you already know I am not speaking about physically inflicted pain.  Of course physical pain can in turn hurt our feelings but...but...

Okay let me use this analogy. You know when you prefer being beaten by your parent or guardian rather than being verbally crucified? Exactly.

I actually do have a problem with writing this post. When you know too much about something and you have the opportunity to express, you tend to be spilling all over the place. I have decided to generously save you the long read and try to try to try to get straight to the point.

A gazillion things cause emotional hurt. Circumstances, love lost, death, bad decisions, bad decisions (so bad I had to name it twice), relationships or lack of them, bad health etc. The list is actually endless hence the use of the canopy,"circumstances". It does cover a lot.

We especially hurt more when we have a hand in what is making us hurt. I for one; I am the crowned queen of beat-yourself-up kingdom. My brain is so funnily wired that when I am hurt, especially by people, I believe that I let them. I gave them the power. I let them in. I let down my guard. I messed up.

With this kind of mentality, you can definitely tell that when I hurt, I hurt deep and I hurt long. I had an outburst yesterday and I said the words, " Let me hurt it out". It wasn't until this morning that I figured that I may have found the only drug that cures emotional pain. Lol okay whatever but at least give me the credit of coining such a beautiful phrase.

My kind of hurt is like a viral disease. It must see its course through. So, if we now know that whatever is eating your heart out must eat it completely, I guess it is best to dress your demon up in fine apparel. Before now, I'd most of the time fight back,trying to hurt hurt. lol. You can read that again. Trust me, it makes sense. But today, I have come to realise the huge word "Acceptance".

I accept that I let myself be hurt. I accept that I am human and I am allowed a certain number of "stupid" to make bad decisions. (Lord know I have maxed my stupid out. I am probably on "Moron" level right now). I accept that I am a good person yet capable of grievous mistakes. I accept that bad things happen to good people. I accept that the universe is not fair. I accept that John the Baptist didn't deserve to die the way he did, but he was still beheaded anyway. I accept that life will most of the time not make any logical sense. Acceptance. 

Acceptance may just in this case mean forgiving yourself and cutting yourself some slack. Now hurt don't care if you is good,if you is bad or if you done accepted shit.(pardon my ebonics) Ya heart will still pain you and trust me, you see that saying that goes "Time flies when you are having a good time"? Believe me when I say that when you are hurting, time becomes a pregnant snail with prosthetic limbs. So ummmm..

Eat...

Cry...

Punch a wall...

Make childish decisions (it is my childish. leave me alone)

Face God (pain has a way of redirecting you to your faith)

Just do whatever makes you feel good in the interim. (Positive stuff people, positive stuff). Allow the pain take its course and by the end of it all, your once teary eyes will see clearer and discern situations a bit better.

What I have been really trying to say is, let yourself hurt it out...