Quit Stuffing The Pain.

Image from www.baypins.com

Although today's topic may seem somewhat contradictory to my regular theory of "Oh, do whatever you have to do to help ease the pain", but it is indeed different. It is one thing to do constructive and expressive stuff to help pass time and channel the hurt out pending when you feel better, but it is an entirely different thing to try to fill up an emptiness created by the pain you feel. I mean, eventually, the emptiness will have to be filled up but only with raisins, sunshine and peace. This is not always the case...scratch that. This is NEVER the case when we are not patient enough for organic healing.We tend to fabricate all sorts of lies to ourselves about what we can suffocate the pain with. 

We try sex. Meaningless intercourse with people we are meaningless to. Even worse off, meaningless intercourse with meaningful people who we mean something to but mean  nothing to us... We see them, but we do not see them. We touch them, but we do not feel them... When it is over and done, we say goodbye and we actually mean it.  This is a typical case of being bad at maths. Emptiness x emptiness= More emptiness. Slow down. Absorb the uneventfulness of life in the moment. Sadness is one of life's many viruses. It takes it's full course; after which, you will be just fine.

I'm currently trying food. "That must be safe to do when you're sad", you're probably thinking. Who am I really kidding? It is as destructive as it looks safe. Might just even be worse than sex because at least, you get to lose some weight while getting your jiggy on. Lol. If not for anything, what I can confidently tell you right now is that you lose more confidence when you are in emotional turmoil and out of shape. Your fears will seem harder to face. Your goals might seem harder to reach. This is a note to myself. Work out. Work your ass out. You can start tomorrow after being a glutton today, but no later than tomorrow. If you can fill the emptiness with a few lean muscles, then that's a much lesser evil.

We try drugs. here's how it works. You dwell in an utter valley of sheer hurt. And then, here's this beautiful helicopter that will make you rise to a level where you can see mountain ranges. The copter takes you upwards and dives sideways and around and around and then it starts to lose gas... And like a noisily deflating balloon, it brings you lower, and lower, and lower and delivers you into such a beautiful bed of the exact same problems. Now you prefer the view up there so you're like "hey, why don't I stay up there a while?".  Nobody will eventually care about how much pain turned you into an addict... Do you want to do that? Spend a lifetime explaining how you got there?

Although alcohol is a drug, it deserves to stand a bit apart as its main aim is to draw gibberish lines on that empty page in your life and make you admire it as art. You just want to keep scribbling. Scribble so hard, you can hardly decipher the whiteness of the page from the blueness of the ink. Pain may not be directly harmful to your liver, but alcohol is. 

I can only imagine the excruciating screams in your soul and all the above may serve as a great bite down, but at some point, we have to endure it. Moderation is key... Don't be caught neck deep.

Channel It Into Creativity!

I am most baffled when I hear people talk about how they do not have any form of creativity. I do not even want to go into the details of how impossible that is. If you say you are not very creative at a particular thing, I can totally understand as I have so many creative deficiencies. For instance, I have a very warped idea of aesthetics when it comes to design. I mean, I can totally recognize an awesome job well done, but having to whip it up myself is another story for Tales By Moonlight. (Whatever happened to that show though?)
Anyway, the point I am trying to make is that we are naturally creative beings and I do not need statistics to prove that to you. Just take a twirl in your current environment and you will affirm this.
Now if you have at least mapped out one of the many things you are indeed superbly creative at, then this post will make sense to you. If on the other hand you are not very sure of what you are capable of being creative at, then you will need to find that thing and come back to this post. Then it will make sense to you.
Positive and negative energy affect my creativity in their respective ways and I am certain it affects yours too...Except of course you all are aliens or just a figment of my imagination.
Prior to the time I knew I could control the flow of energy (personal and external), I allowed negative energy rid me of all my creative abilities. It made me sit around and brood, waiting for a burst of excitement before I could birth my abstract fetus into a reality baby. Sometimes, it took this burst of excitement weeks or even months to show up which was detrimental in all sorts of ways because creativity like many other things, needs consistency for better output.
You can actually turn your dark moments into sublime art. Finished work may be dark but it will brim with brilliance and emotional authenticity. Paint that negativity as is, using words that come from your innermost being or with whatever it is you express yourself through.